Centerline Rumble Strips

Keep going until you hit that place where they’re thinking of building that drive-in bank

Hallelujah, I made it to the Aroostook Hospitality Inn in Washburn *just* before nightfall. Judging by all the warning signs for wandering moose and deer and ATV-ers who should not be operating under the influence, this was fortuitous.

Getting here took literally half a day. I believe I have been through so many Main Streets in the last 12 hours that I could design the perfect Disney Ride for bored suburbanites who will probably never swing through a series of towns with “Corner” in their name. Picture something like the Haunted Mansion ride, only instead of the hansom cab that conveys you, you’re in a three-year-old, four-door sedan of ambiguous origin. The conveyor starts out at 60 miles per hour, but drops to 45 at the first sign of an auto parts store. Two seconds later, your drop another 10 mph at [Somebody’s] Floral & Gift store.

By the time you hit the stone church (St. Mary’s/Ann’s/Patrick’s) you’re crawling at 25 mph and turning first to the Insurance company on one side of the street to the building on the other side with plywood over two windows and one window so dusty you can barely make out the pile of junk stacked to the rafters. There’s a bank. A post office. Maybe a second-hand store. At the gas station with a drive-thru Dunkin’ Donuts you’re up to 35 again. Once you reach the unisex hair salon (or pet groomer) you’re finally at the other end of town! Speed away! Look out for the dead skunk.

Gosh, that sounds just like the GM/Norman Bel Geddes exhibit at the 1939 World’s Fair, Futurama, only exactly the opposite. Past-a-palooza?

It could happen.

Well. Tomorrow, I hop up to Fort Kent and finally get this ball rolling. Meanwhile…

Some Pics from Today
Really Good Music Block by Accident on Shuffle

Author: Beth Daniels

DC writer | Old movies. Old Washington. Any old thing.

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